Grudge Match

Swoop goes looking for Divebomb to settle an old score and stop a humiliating secret from his past from becoming known… and their respective teams, the Dinobots and the Predacons, are close behind

Forget Rodimus Prime versus Galvatron or Blaster and Goldbug locking horns with the Mechanic… or even Buster Witwicky’s soapy showdown with Ratbat in a car wash (as if we could), the big fight of the year 1987 is, insofar as Simon Furman is concerned, the Dinobots versus the Predacons! According to the Transformers UK comic, fans have been demanding that the two teams meet in battle. While I’m not so sure of the claim myself, in those pre-internet days it would have impossible to disprove. In any case, in October 1987 this is what Furman (and artist Jeff Anderson) was poised to deliver…

The pre-text for the big fight was a throwaway line in the (much) earlier story, The Icarus Theory, about the Dinobot Swoop being known as Divebomb when he was on Cybertron as a member of the Autobot Elite Flying Corps. He’d resented Optimus Prime’s authority back then and, in the story, Prime is able to leverage this to force Swoop’s personality to reassert itself and override Professor Morris mind control.

So, when Hasbro subsequently brought out an actual Decepticon toy called Divebomb, Furman had a problem. He explained the discrepancy away by saying Swoop had lost the name due to being defeated in combat. The Annual story What’s In a Name? explains all this and sets up the events of Grudge Match rather neatly.

The story opens at a circus big top in Florida where the ring master whips up the crowd for a night of surprises… He’s not wrong. Moments later the Predacon Headstrong charges through O’Connor’s Circus scattering performers and spectators alike and crashing through the side of the tent. Nearby, a boy is pestering his father to see the big cats, and right on cue Razorclaw and Rampage pounce on to assembled funfair and trample the amusements. Rampage tosses a Big Wheel in the direction of Tantrum, who presumably was supposed to catch it but instead manages to shatter it into so many pieces. What’s the purpose of all this? Nothing really, it’s just a bit of mindless mayhem that the team have been needing since relocating to Earth. As Divebomb, who is nearby but finds the idea of tormenting lesser creatures beneath his status as an elite hunter, notes that things had started well: Optimus Prime and Megatron had been worthy quarry but since then Earth has been deadly dull.

Despite not having seen Swoop in four million years, Divebomb’s thoughts turn to his old sparring partner and wondering what happened to him. Does he know that Swoop is also on Earth and now part of a team? If not its mightily coincidental that Divebomb should be thinking of this memory from his long distant past on this very night.

Through Divebomb’s dialogue, are reminded that the Predacons combine to form Predaking (which is as well as the gestalt is sadly absent from the story – a missed opportunity perhaps?) and we cut to the Ark where the Swoop and Sludge see the circus rampage on the TV news.

Sludge finds it all very funny for some odd and inappropriate reason, but Swoop is visibly shocked at Divebomb’s reappearance. Sludge doesn’t understand his colleague’s strong emotional response, after all they’ve all lost battles before so why does this one matter? For Swoop, the fact that he got beaten by Divebomb and only survived due to the intervention of Optimus Prime, is a source of eternal shame. He thinks he’ll be disgraced if the truth comes out and he must silence Divebomb. It’s a massive overreaction but it speaks to Swoop’s emotional personality which we’ve seen lead him into trouble so many times before. Rather than come clean to his fellow Dinobots, Swoop explains his reaction with the immortal line: “he’s still usin’ my name.”

Shortly after, Divebomb is circling the Florida swamps in bird of prey mode. Suddenly a missile clips his wing and he spins around to see Swoop gunning for him. Divebomb is overjoyed! This is exactly the sort of excitement he’s been craving, and he wastes no time in getting stuck in. Unfortunately, it appears that the years since their last encounter has not shifted the balance in Swoop’s favour – he’s still weaker and less accomplished in battle than Divebomb. Pretty soon he’s dumped in the swamp and Divebomb as transforms and lands. Swoop is not done yet. He too reverts to robot mode and the pair are settling old scores with their fists when suddenly they are distracted by a noise off panel… the other Predacons have arrived (to the displeasure of both winged warriors) but that’s especially bad news for Swoop.

The second half begins with Swoop getting a good beating from the Predacons, with leader Razorclaw delivers the blows. Divebomb is taking no part in the punishment. This battle with Swoop is personal and he doesn’t appreciate his Predacon teammates muscling in on his fun, but neither does he say as much, it’s left to his actions. Interestingly, Swoop’s internal monologue still thinks he would have avenged himself against Divebomb had the other Predacons not arrived. I’m not sure that even Swoop is convinced by that.

As Razorclaw bends down to pick up his sword, the huge foot of Grimlock steps on it. The Dinobots look after their own, declares Grimlock, before booting Razorclaw aside. Slag and Snarl waste no time in squaring up to Headstrong and Tantrum and Divebomb goads Swoop with the threat that he might just tell the other Dinobots about Swoop’s disgrace. “I’ll kill you first,” is Swoop impassioned response, which is of course music to the Predacon’s ears. They take to the sky for round four.

Despite the billing, this does seem to be a one-sided fight. Grimlock is making light work of Razorclaw, despite the latter being a supposedly deadly predator, while Slag is just softening Tantrum up before exposing him to his fiery breath; while Headstrong is feeling the power of Snarl’s tail and Rampage will soon be worn down by Sludge (who is too stupid to admit defeat – a great line). If there was ever a time that the Predacons needed to pull their combiner trick it’s at this moment, but it never comes.

Swoop and Divebomb continue their battle in the skies above. He’s holding his own, but for how long? Swoop calculates a way to win through deception – he places himself in the firing line to Grimlock to make it appear that Divebomb has unleashed a missile attack against the Dinobot leader. Grimlock responds in typical fashion by using Razorclaw’s sword to clip the Predacon’s wings. Moments later, Grimlock is throttling Divebomb with his bare hands and Swoop only feels even more wretched.

Divebomb, naturally, attempts to save his skin by telling Grimlock that he is being played by Swoop and then spills the beans about the events on Cybertron. Grimlock listens attentively before dropping Divebomb and hoisting a huge boulder aloft. The Predacon cowers as Grimlock reveals that he’s known all about the incident for ages – since he became Autobot leader and had access to all of Prime’s unlogged reports. He doesn’t care because Swoop is a member of his team, and Dinobots look after their own. This is welcome characterisation from Furman, showing that Grimlock is a lot smarter than the crown-wearing oaf that the US stories make him out to be. His response to Swoop’s predicament is measured and proportionate and he’s looking out for someone under his command by keeping the secret.

As Divebomb cowers, awaiting the impact of the boulder, Swoop steps in to spare him. It’s time he stopped letting others fight his battles, he says. Grimlock understands that this is Swoop’s battle and is content to go along with how his colleague chooses to resolve it. The upshot is that the Predacons are allow to walk away, albeit humiliated (so much for the Decepticons’ elite hunting cadre). Swoop decides it’s time to come clean to his teammates about what that ‘certain battle on Cybertron’. Meanwhile, Razorclaw offers Divebomb a pistol and suggests that he “take out Swoop and scarper” (somewhat odd language for a Transformer but I digress). Divebomb declines: for the first time in a while he is finally starting to have fun – his playmate is back, and he intends to enjoy himself.

It’s a strong end the story and sets up the prospect of further encounters. Sadly, Simon Furman would not get around to giving us the rematch these two deserved and we wouldn’t see much of the Predacons from this point on, save for an appearance in the 1988 story Toy Soldiers (chasing Throttlebot brain modules in remote controlled cars) and then reduced to background cameos thereafter.

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